Bollywood, where is our Nora Ephron? by Mohar Basu

   

 

India makes films about love like Musafir Cafe and Love. So why does it struggle to make romantic comedies that see the world through a woman's eyes?

I think it is not fair that a woman can watch You've Got Mail for the fifteenth time and still get butterflies when Meg Ryan walks into that bookshop, but Bollywood, an industry that has practically built its empire on people falling in love, has so few films that make women feel this way. You can come up with the old examples of DDLJ and Dil Toh Pagal Hai and Hum Tum but how many shows or movies in the past 5 years have made us go giddy? I had this thought while watching The Love Hypothesis that there is a rom-com shaped void in our hearts that no one knows how to fill. 

As a millennial on bad days and during holiday season, I turn to Nora Ephron, because the lady knew the secret. Romance wasn't just about the grand gesture, the airport chase or a man realising that he couldn't live without the woman he'd spent two hours taking for granted. It was also about the woman. As my friends and I discuss often, romance and rom-com is the only genre where women have agency, women are thriving and good things are happening to them. 

In this genre - the spotlight is on what she wants, what she fears, the terrible decisions she makes, the conversations she replayed in her head and the possibility that the man she was falling for might, actually, be an idiot.

In When Harry Met Sally…, Sleepless in Seattle and You've Got Mail, Ephron made neuroses sexy, conversation an aphrodisiac and ordinary life something worth dressing up for. Her women had careers, apartments, opinions and very specific ideas about food. They could be romantic without being silly, ambitious without being cold and lonely without being tragic. They didn't need to be extraordinary women doing extraordinary things. They just needed to be interesting.

And Bollywood? Bollywood has a love affair with love. It just isn't always interested in the woman experiencing it. If you have watched Romantics - you know how obsessed our movies and filmmakers have been with the idea of people falling in love.

And if I am being fair, Hindi cinema has given us wonderful female characters and romantic films that have endured for generations. But look at the space available to women in today's mainstream storytelling. The female-led film carries the weight of a social issue, a feminist statement or an inspirational journey. The romantic comedy, meanwhile, is built around a male protagonist's pursuit, with the woman serving as his motivation, his reward or the plot twist that gets him to grow up.

Where is the film about a woman who has a perfectly good job, a complicated relationship with her mother, a questionable taste in men and absolutely no idea what she is doing with her life? Where is the 38-year-old who wants to fall in love but doesn't want to be told that her biological clock is ticking? Where is the woman who can be selfish, funny, sexually confident, insecure and spectacularly wrong about a man without the screenplay treating her as either a cautionary tale or a role model?

This is where the female gaze is crucial. It isn't simply about putting a woman behind the camera or making the male lead look good in a linen shirt. It is about whose feelings get the close-up - whose desire drives the plot, who gets to be complicated.

Ephron's women weren't always right. They were allowed to be a glorious mess. The films didn't punish them for wanting romance and being miserable post break ups, nor did they suggest that finding a man was the ultimate prize. Love was part of the adventure, not the entire itinerary of the vacation called life.

The opportunity for Indian cinema is enormous. Our dating lives come with parental surveillance, matrimonial apps, class anxieties, WhatsApp overthinking and the very Indian art of pretending not to care while caring deeply. There is enough material here for a dozen brilliant romantic comedies. We have the locations, the actors and an audience that continues to show up for a good love story. What we seem to lack is the conviction that a woman's everyday emotional life can hold a film together without a murder, a courtroom or a social evil thrown in for good measure.

Nobody is asking Bollywood to transplant Manhattan to Mumbai or turn every heroine into Meg Ryan. We need our own version of that magic - a woman talking too much, falling for the wrong people, changing their minds and figuring themselves out somewhere between work, friendship and a terrible date. Make space for these stories!

Because the great thing about a Nora Ephron film was never that everything worked out perfectly. It was that, for two hours, the mess of being alive and in love felt worth watching. It felt cinematic and glorious! For an industry that has spent decades selling us romance, Bollywood could do with remembering that women aren't merely the reason men fall in love. They have love stories of their own.

And frankly, we'd quite like to watch them.

 

 

BIO: Mohar Basu is a journalist with Mid-Day and author of bestselling books Shah Rukh Khan : Legend, Icon, Star and Salman Khan : The Sultan of Bollywood. She writes about cinema, stardom, fan cultures and the impact of cinema and the movie industry on society. 

( THIS IS THE 7 th WEEK - 11 TH YEAR of BFL-  PART OF GUEST POST SERIES- POST -7)

Nature Heals: Finding Peace While Waiting at the Clinic

  

We often visit a clinic with a mind full of thoughts. Waiting for our turn to see the doctor can make us anxious, especially when we keep thinking about the consultation, the questions we need to ask, and what the doctor might say. Sometimes, we prepare ourselves mentally so much that we forget to relax.

But what if we could turn this waiting time into a moment of peace by simply paying attention to nature? During a recent visit to a clinic, while waiting for my turn, I decided to look out of the adjacent window. Instead of concentrating on the doctor's discussion or mentally preparing myself for the consultation, I let my eyes wander outside.

To my surprise, I spotted two mynahs perched on two different branches of a coconut tree. One sat above the other, as though they had chosen their own little seats to enjoy the view. Dark clouds were slowly gathering in the sky, hinting at the possibility of rain.

One mynah was stretching its legs, while the other opened its little beak and chirped in a sweet, baby-like voice. Their tiny movements caught my attention. As the wind gently swayed the branches of the coconut tree, the two birds seemed to be enjoying a natural swing, moving along with the rhythm of the breeze. There they were, perched high above the ground, completely at ease even as the clouds gathered around them. They did not seem bothered by the changing weather. They simply stayed where they were, chirping, stretching and enjoying their little moment together.

And there I was, sitting inside a clinic, waiting for my turn!

For those few minutes, my attention shifted from my thoughts to the little world outside the window. The birds, the swaying branches, the coconut tree and the clouds became the centre of my attention. Without making any special effort, I began to feel relaxed. It was such a simple experience, yet it made a difference to my state of mind.

I was reminded of the words and wisdom of Ruskin Bond, whose writings often celebrate the beauty of nature and the comfort it brings us. Nature has a wonderful way of drawing us away from our worries and helping us appreciate the present moment. We do not always need a garden, a hill station or a long walk in the countryside to experience this connection. Sometimes, a tree outside a clinic window, two little birds on its branches, or the sound of leaves moving in the wind can be enough to make us pause and smile. Nature asks for nothing from us. It simply invites us to notice.

The next time you find yourself waiting at a clinic, in a hospital corridor or even at a bus stop, try looking around. Observe the trees, watch the birds, notice the clouds or listen to the breeze. Instead of allowing your thoughts to run endlessly, give yourself a few moments to enjoy what is happening around you. Of course, we need to pay attention to the doctor's advice and prepare for our consultations. But we need not spend every minute of the waiting period worrying about what lies ahead.

Sometimes, a little attention to nature can make the wait more pleasant and our minds a little calmer. That day, the two mynahs were probably doing nothing extraordinary. They were simply being birds, perched on a coconut tree and enjoying the breeze before the rain. Yet, without knowing it, they helped me relax.

A little time with nature can remind us to slow down, breathe and live in the present. Nature may not take away our worries, but it can help us look at them with a calmer mind. And perhaps that is one of nature's simplest gifts to us: healing moments hidden in our everyday lives, waiting to be noticed.

Have you ever found peace or comfort by watching birds, trees or clouds while waiting somewhere? Share your little nature moments in the comments.

Super Happy Day Story

  

 

The bright orange sun flashed its rays into my balcony,

 Announcing a happy day, warm and sunny.

 The rain had stopped by night, leaving a morning so cool,

 With dewdrops kissing the plants, making nature look beautiful.

 

The clothes from yesterday were drying happily on the line,

 While the fresh morning breeze made everything fine.

Pigeons, crows, mynas, cuckoos, parrots and sparrows,

Chirped away in a row, with stories of their own to share.

 

Perhaps they too were planning a super happy day,

With songs and little adventures along the way.

 I read an old favourite story before breakfast,

A little joy that made my morning the best.

 

Then came a hot, yummy breakfast, fresh and delicious,

Making my simple morning feel truly precious.

 With a happy heart, I sat down to write,

 Turning my thoughts into words, feeling bright.

 

A step, a point, a theme to pursue,

For a super happy day story, fresh and new.

What more could I ask for to brighten my day?

 God will bless me, I'm sure, in every possible way!

May my happiness spread to everyone I meet, making this super happy day truly complete!

From Navarathri to Diwali: Stay Healthy, Stay Safe This Rainy Season

    

 

The festive season is in full swing! Vijaya Dasami marks the end of Navarathri and Dussehra celebrations, bringing nine days of devotion, fasting, feasting, prayers and religious customs to a close. For many families, it is a time to return to their regular routines and prepare for the next big festival, Diwali, which is just a few days away.

During Navarathri, some people observe fasts and follow dietary restrictions, avoiding onion, garlic and certain vegetables. Once the festival ends, it is time to gradually return to a balanced diet that includes a variety of vegetables, fruits, pulses and other nutritious foods.

With the rainy season bringing changes in weather, humidity and the risk of seasonal infections, this is the right time to focus on our health and well-being. A few simple changes in our food habits and daily routines can help us stay fit and prepare ourselves for the upcoming festivities.

Eat Well to Stay Healthy

Food plays an important role in maintaining our health. Include a variety of vegetables in your everyday meals and make use of seasonal produce wherever possible.

• Ginger and garlic: Add them to suitable dishes for flavour and variety.
• Turmeric: Use this familiar kitchen ingredient in your regular cooking.
• Amla and lemon: Include these sources of vitamin C in your diet.
• Sambar and rasam: Prepare nourishing, home-cooked meals with vegetables, spices and pulses.
• Fruits: Enjoy fruits such as oranges and guavas as part of a balanced diet.
• Almonds and nuts: Have a small portion as a snack.
• Warm milk: Enjoy a cup if it suits your dietary needs.

There is no need to make drastic changes to your diet overnight. If you have been fasting or following particular food restrictions, return to your regular meals gradually and eat according to your appetite.

Remember, no single food can prevent seasonal infections. A varied diet, adequate sleep, hydration and good hygiene work together to support overall health.

Keep Moving, Even When It Rains

Rainy weather may discourage us from going for our usual walks. Wet roads, waterlogging and slippery pathways can make outdoor exercise difficult. But that need not mean giving up physical activity altogether.

Make a little time for gentle exercise at home. Stretch your body, walk around indoors, practise simple movements or follow a suitable indoor workout. Even a short period of movement can help you maintain your routine.

Do not overexert yourself. The aim is to remain active, not to exhaust the body. If you have a medical condition or specific exercise restrictions, follow your doctor's advice.

Hygiene Is the First Step Towards Prevention

The rainy season calls for extra attention to personal hygiene and cleanliness at home. Damp surroundings and stagnant water can create conditions that encourage the spread of infections and mosquitoes.

Here are some simple habits to follow:

• Wash your hands frequently with soap and water, especially before eating, after using the toilet and after returning home from outside.
• Cover your mouth and nose with a tissue or your bent elbow when you cough or sneeze. Encourage others to follow the same practice.
• Keep the kitchen clean and dry. Wipe countertops, clean the sink and avoid leaving water or food waste lying around.
• Maintain bathroom hygiene. Clean sinks, washbasins, toilets and frequently touched surfaces regularly, using appropriate cleaning products according to their labels.
• Wash clothes after wearing them, particularly if they have become damp with rain or sweat. Dry them thoroughly before wearing them again.
• Use an iron when appropriate to help ensure clothes are dry, but remember that ironing is not a substitute for proper washing and drying.
• Take a warm bath if you find it comfortable. Use clean towels and keep your bathing area free of slippery patches.

A clean home is a healthier home. Small, consistent efforts can make a significant difference.

Eat Warm Food and Drink Safe Water

During the rainy season, many of us prefer warm, freshly prepared food. This is a good opportunity to enjoy homemade meals such as idli, dosa, vegetable sambar, rasam and soups.

Eat food that has been cooked thoroughly and stored safely. Refrigerate perishable leftovers promptly and reheat them thoroughly before eating. Warm food is comforting, but it does not need to be piping hot.

Drink safe water throughout the day. Use a properly maintained water purifier or boil water when appropriate for your local water supply. Keep drinking-water containers clean and covered.

Be mindful of food and water hygiene when eating outside, too. Avoid food that has been left uncovered or exposed to flies and rain.

Protect Yourself from Mosquitoes

Rainwater collected in pots, discarded containers, tyres and other objects can become breeding sites for mosquitoes. Since mosquito-borne illnesses are a concern during the rainy season, prevention begins at home.

• Empty containers that collect water and check them regularly.
• Keep overhead tanks and water-storage containers covered.
• Use window screens, mosquito nets or suitable repellents.
• Wear clothing that covers your arms and legs when practical.
• Follow local public-health advice during outbreaks.

Do not ignore persistent fever, severe body aches, unusual weakness or other concerning symptoms. Seek medical advice promptly instead of self-medicating.

Get Ready for Diwali, One Healthy Habit at a Time

Navarathri and Dussehra may be coming to an end, but the festive spirit continues. Before we immerse ourselves in Diwali preparations, shopping, cleaning, cooking and celebrations, let us give our bodies a little attention.

We often spend considerable time preparing our homes for festivals. Why not spend some time preparing ourselves, too?

Eat balanced meals, stay hydrated, sleep well, exercise indoors when the weather prevents outdoor activity, maintain personal hygiene and keep your surroundings clean. These simple habits can help you feel more comfortable and prepared for the days ahead.

Health is not a festival that we celebrate once a year; it is a habit we practise every day.

As we bid farewell to Navarathri and welcome the next celebration, let us carry forward the spirit of renewal into our daily lives. With sensible food choices, cleanliness and preventive care, we can look forward to Diwali with greater confidence and well-being.

Stay healthy, stay safe, and have a happy and healthy Diwali!

Prestige Endura 1000 Watts Mixer Grinder – A Handy Alternative to a Wet Grinder?

 

   

 

In a South Indian household, idli and dosa batter are kitchen essentials. Traditionally, we rely on a wet grinder to prepare the batter, which gives us soft, fluffy idlis and crispy dosas. However, handling a wet grinder can be quite a task, especially when it comes to lifting the heavy stone drum and cleaning it after use.

We recently bought the Prestige Endura 1000 Watts Mixer Grinder, hoping to use it as an alternative to our regular wet grinder. We wondered whether a mixer grinder could serve the same purpose and deliver the desired results. After trying it out, we are happy to share our experience!

Does it serve the purpose?

The answer is YES!

We ground idli and dosa batter using the Prestige Endura mixer grinder, and the results were encouraging. The batter was smooth, the mixer grinder did not become noticeably hot during our grinding session, and the idlis turned out soft while the dosas were crispy. For us, that was a pleasant surprise!

Easy to handle and convenient to use

One of the biggest advantages of using a mixer grinder is its convenience. Unlike a traditional wet grinder, which has a heavy stone drum, this appliance is easier to handle. There is no need to lift or move a heavy stone assembly, making the entire process less cumbersome. It also grinds quickly, saving us time in the kitchen. When we want to prepare idli or dosa batter without the effort involved in operating a wet grinder, this mixer grinder comes in handy.

Our batter preparation experience

Our tip is to soak the ingredients for about six hours before grinding. We found that this worked well for preparing a smooth batter in the Prestige Endura 1000 Watts mixer grinder. The grinding time is relatively short, and the convenience makes it a practical option for everyday cooking. Of course, the final texture also depends on the ingredients, their proportions, the quantity being ground and the grinding technique.

Three jars for different needs

We purchased the model that comes with three jars, each serving a different purpose.

• Wet grinding jar: Useful for grinding wet ingredients, including idli and dosa batter in suitable quantities.
• Dry grinding jar: Handy for grinding dry ingredients.
• Small chutney jar: Convenient for preparing chutneys to accompany our idlis and dosas.

Having three jars makes the appliance versatile and useful for several everyday kitchen tasks.

Mixer grinder versus wet grinder

A traditional wet grinder remains a popular choice for preparing larger quantities of idli and dosa batter. However, if you prefer a compact, convenient appliance that is easier to handle and quicker to use for smaller batches, a powerful mixer grinder can be a practical alternative.

The important thing is to avoid overloading the jar and to follow the manufacturer's instructions regarding quantities and continuous grinding time. Even a 1000-watt motor can generate heat, so it is wise to take breaks if needed rather than assume that the appliance will never heat up.

Our verdict

The Prestige Endura 1000 Watts Mixer Grinder has made our batter preparation easier. We are happy with the smooth batter, soft idlis and crispy dosas we achieved. Its ease of handling, quick grinding and three useful jars make it a convenient addition to our kitchen.

Does it completely replace a wet grinder for every household and every quantity? Not necessarily. But for our needs, it has proved to be a useful alternative.

Would we recommend it? If you are looking for a convenient mixer grinder for everyday kitchen tasks and want to try preparing idli and dosa batter without handling a heavy wet grinder, the Prestige Endura 1000 Watts is worth considering based on our experience.

 

Disclaimer: This is our personal experience with the product we purchased. Your results may vary depending on the ingredients, quantity and method of preparation.

Managing Diabetes During Holidays, Festivals and Travel

   

 

My parents are both diabetic, and they need to adhere to the doctor's advice. They need to follow certain daily routines and stay on track during holidays, festivals and travel too. After all, diabetes management is not something we can take a break from just because we are on holiday or celebrating a festival!

Our doctor always insists on three things every day — Walk, Water and Watch.

The Three Ws

1. Walk

Go for a walk in the morning and evening. Wherever you go on holiday or travel, take time for walking during the day and evening. If adjustments are needed, choose convenient times, but don't miss walking. Walking is a simple daily routine that can help people manage their blood glucose levels and stay active. However, the duration and intensity should suit the person's age, health and physical ability.

2. Water

Have water regularly throughout the day. Carry water bottles and keep them near you so that you can have water regularly. At night too, keep water near your bed. Staying hydrated is important, particularly when travelling or spending time outdoors. Follow the doctor's advice on fluid intake if there are other medical conditions that require restrictions. 

3.Watch

Watch comedy on TV or OTT and be watchful with your diet. Watch shows that make you laugh seriously, till you feel the joy. This will indirectly lower your stress levels. As stress can affect blood glucose levels, so people with diabetes need to manage their stress and find ways to relax.

A good laugh can help us relax and feel better. Holidays and festivals should be happy occasions, and taking time to enjoy a favourite comedy show can be a simple way to unwind. After all, festivals and holidays are meant to bring joy, not stress!

Our doctor says that if you don't follow these three Ws, even medicines won't work. The three Ws are a reminder that managing diabetes involves more than just taking medicines. Then come the medicines, which must be taken as advised by the doctor.

Watch Your Diet During Festivals and Travel

Portion control and protein intake are the ones mainly stressed for my parents. Being pure vegetarians, green leafy vegetables, pulses, sambar and sundal made with soaked legumes were suggested. Mainly, portion control and eating on time are important. Have small, frequent meals if advised, and don't skip breakfast or other meals.

During festivals, have sweets and snacks in limited portions. During travel too, opt for fruits, dry fruits and healthy snacks. As rice is our staple food in South India, portion control is the main thing. Including more vegetables, dal, nuts and legumes makes the meal filling.

Festivals bring with them a variety of sweets, savouries and special meals. It is difficult to avoid all our traditional delicacies, nor should every celebration become a source of worry. Being mindful of portions and following the doctor's dietary advice can help us enjoy festive food more responsibly.

When travelling, it is useful to carry suitable snacks instead of depending entirely on what is available along the way. Keeping meal timings as regular as possible can also help. The idea is not to miss out on the fun but to enjoy food in moderation while taking care of our health.

FreeStyle Libre: Keeping Track While Enjoying Life

Along with the three Ws — Walk, Water and Watch — keeping track of blood glucose levels is important for people with diabetes. During holidays, festivals and travel, our usual routines may change, and we may eat different foods or at different times.

This is where FreeStyle Libre, a continuous glucose monitoring system, can be helpful. It measures glucose in the fluid beneath the skin and provides information about glucose levels and trends. Depending on the device and individual circumstances, it can reduce the need for frequent finger-prick tests, although finger-prick testing may still be necessary in certain situations.

However, is FreeStyle Libre suitable for everyone with diabetes, particularly older adults?

My family's experience

My parents are both diabetic, but they manage their condition with tablets, diet and walking, without insulin. Their doctor has not advised them to use FreeStyle Libre. They continue to follow the doctor's advice and their daily routines. One of our relatives was initially advised to use FreeStyle Libre. However, considering their age and other health conditions, its use was later discontinued after other factors were taken into account.

This made me realise that what works for one person may not necessarily work for another.

Even when a device is approved for use by older adults, that does not mean it is necessary or suitable for every individual. Age, other medical conditions, the type of diabetes treatment, ease of using the device, skin comfort and individual monitoring needs all have to be considered.

For people aged 75 and above, the decision to use FreeStyle Libre should be made in consultation with their treating doctor. The doctor can assess whether continuous glucose monitoring would be beneficial and practical for the individual. We need to exercise care and caution rather than simply adopting new technology because it is available. If the device is prescribed, it should be used according to the doctor's instructions.

Technology can support diabetes management, but it does not replace prescribed medicines, appropriate food choices, physical activity or regular medical follow-ups.

Enjoy Your Holidays, Festivals and Travel

Festivals, holidays and travel are times to enjoy with family and friends. But when parents are diabetic, we need to ensure that their daily routines are followed even during these occasions.

Here are a few things to keep in mind:

• Walk in the morning and evening, adjusting the timings to suit the day's plans and physical ability.
• Drink water regularly, following the doctor's advice.
• Watch comedy or enjoy other relaxing activities to help manage stress.
• Be watchful with food, practise portion control and eat on time.
• Carry fruits, dry fruits and suitable snacks while travelling.
• Take medicines as prescribed and continue recommended glucose monitoring.
• Consult the doctor before making changes to the diabetes management routine or introducing a monitoring device.

The three Ws our doctor insists on — Walk, Water and Watch — are simple reminders to stay mindful of our health. Then come the medicines, as prescribed by the doctor.

Managing diabetes is a daily responsibility, but it need not take away the joy of celebrating festivals, visiting relatives or travelling to new places. With thoughtful planning, appropriate food choices and medical guidance, we can make these occasions enjoyable for everyone in the family. Follow the three Ws, take medicines as advised, practise portion control and eat on time. Let's make our festivals, travels and holidays enjoyable while taking care of our parents' health!

( This article shares personal family experiences and general information. Diabetes management needs vary from person to person. Consult the treating doctor for individual advice on diet, exercise, medicines and glucose monitoring, including the suitability of FreeStyle Libre.)

Disclaimer: This article has been written as part of an awareness initiative by Blogchatter and reflects the author’s personal views. It is for informational purposes only. It does not constitute medical advice, diagnosis or treatment recommendations. Please consult your doctor for advice specific to your individual health needs.